6 Ways You Destroy Trust with Others: Leaders in The Know Change Their Behavior

April 12th, 2011

We are living in a time when TRUST bec

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omes one of the biggest factors for people in who they work with, for and collaborate

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We all know the 3 basic points of selling, people have to know, like and trust you in order to not only buy from you but to follow you.  No matter what you do for a living, everyday you’re selling and influencing others with your ideas and behavior.  Are there sure fired ways of destroying trust?  Leaders in the know, know that these 6 behaviors will without a doubt crumble your influence and leave you isolated.

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1)    Failure to listen to others – Refer back to my earlier article on the “Art of Listening”. Being unable to engage in the simple art of listening effectively leaves you lost in your own thoughts and fears.  Distracted and unresponsive to those that you are speaking with.

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Remedy: Practice the Art of Listening outlined in my previous post.

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2)    Failure to take action – When a situation or opportunity arises if you fail to take action, one way or another, you are perceived as arrogant and potentially disconnected from the wants, needs and desires of those around you – including yourself.

Remedy: Take an action to address situations that arise.  No matter what the outcome is, it’s important to be seen as engaged and active in correcting a problem or jumping on an opportunity.

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3)    Failure to Embrace an Attitude of Hope – Without hope, there is no way anyone, including you, your team, prospects, clients and/or vendors will ever be able to see the potential for your role in their engagement.  Being a Debbie-Downer will only leave you….alone and isolated.

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Remedy: Do your best to look beyond your own fears and see the glimmer of hope and possibility in every situation – no matter how slim it may be.

4)    Failure to Engage and Enlist Others Opinions, Advice or Input – When the people around you are running the other way or hide what they’re working on it’s a sure sign that they know you’re not open to this type of

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open communication. Collaboration is not part of your style.

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Remedy: Ask for others input and then say nothing, just listen.  Thank them and take the information away to process privately if you’re unable to do so in the moment.

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5)    Failure to be Flexible – An inability to see others point of view, perspective or another possible solution puts you in the position of always needing to be “right”.

Remedy: Allow for the possibility that you may not have all the pieces to the puzzle and realize that it’s actually ok.  You’re not required to be perfect.

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6)    Failure to Keep A Confidence – If you’re talking about sensitive issues that were offered in confidence, then you’ ve placed yourself in a position of being percei

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ved as someone who betrays others.

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Remedy: Don’t do it.

Each of these behaviors shuts others down.  It creates distrust that no matter what they say, contribute or try to offer to the process they will be shot down. Leaders in the know, know that shifting these behaviors will build trust and credibility with those around them.  Start with LISTENING and then work through the list.  Notice when you have a twinge of wanting to revert to one

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of these heavy-handed behaviors to shift your own perception.

Bio Box:
Maria Gamb (http://www.MariaGamb.com ) is an author, speaker and mentor to emerging leaders in business.

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Her first book ever “Healing the Corporate World” (http://www.HealingTheCorporateWorld.com) was launched on Amazon in 2010 broke into the Top10 Bestsellers in Business/Leadership joining the ranks of the highly influential all boys club of authors such as Jim Collins, Daniel Pink and Carmine Gallo.

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One Response to “6 Ways You Destroy Trust with Others: Leaders in The Know Change Their Behavior”

  1. Dij says:

    This article is SO RIGHT ON!!! Thank you for spelling it out so simply. And, it is so true for all levels of business and encompasses personal relationships. Thank you!

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